What I am trying to do?

It seems that I have this tendancy to drive too fast the car that is my life... After spending some quality yellow time with myself, I merely looked up in the mirror and realised i'm so tired, I couldn't lie anymore... Tired, yet not efficient, nor productive, not even sustainable... And I thought of the things I plan each day to do or to start, short-term plans like BCE, DELE, degree, classes, AIESEC, people, driver's license, planning to go abroad, conferences, catching up on reading and movies... What am I doing?... Where am I running to? I'm gonna get caught up in the process again....

I just got this kind of block...I wanted to write about my birthday...so consuming, pictures, blue and fast, about my going to Bucharest...not at ease, revealing, clouds way up high for a clear representation of... just for me... I wanted to write about so many things, but I thought my inspiration ran away or something or I kept on saying to myself there is no time, or most probably things were going too fast and they weren't very clear...

I promised myself I won't make myself feel pressured in anyway... I just can't help hurting myself...

After chairing the AIESEC presentation and understanding different perspectives some people have on me, I suddenly realised I need different and more intense development experiences which can help me define my style... I'm looking for, I'm trying to adapt to a new life style, of which I was not aware up to now, with everything that is integrated in one...

Values change, people change... Just live, love, learn and let go... I always thought i am not doing enough, that there is always room for more... Not now... Equilibrium means now more than ever respect for your body and soul... They get new meanings, they might change... It's a not a matter of holding on to them, denying the change, being afraid of it... It all goes down to understanding that the change is you, it has already happened... just define it, find my perfect comprised word for it, and accept that the person in the mirror is you, really you...


There tones of things i might or actually need right now... But I would sum it up by simply taking care of myself... Isn't this the road to being self-sufficient?... I may be on the right track after all... The mindset of patience and peace...

Micky
antagonic feelings and lies in my secret life...